Sit down dear listener as I tell you a tale...
... a tale of mirth and woe (not really).
It's a tale of a birthday girl and her dear friends... who's accidental application of her birthday to the incorrect date nearly saw them suffer a grisly fate including, amongst other things... having a portrait of my blue monkey jammie clad self surgically affixed to the inside of their eyelids to plague them in their sleep!
My birthday was last Tuesday, the 7th in case any of you would like to note it down in your diaries for next year (and no, of course I have no moral objection to hideously expensive gifts... thanks for asking).
My day commenced at 5:30am with...
(Munchkins singing) Happy Birthday to you, you're 102, you look like a monkey and you smell like one toooooo! (repeat 17 times at ear splitting volumes to fully appreciate the effects it had at such a wee hour of the morning after yet another night of ridiculously pointless insomnia!)
... and concluded at midnight, as all days do and there'd been one.. count them... ONE, happy birthday phone call.. being from the oh so talented A-N, who shares the same birthday as myself so in essence, we sing happy birthday to each other.
So there I was.. by Wednesday morning, muttering things to do with my friends entrails next time I saw them when lo! the mobile phone doth beep!!
An SMS had arrived from N 'doing the happy birthday dance' for me and requesting what species of cheesecake I'd like for Friday night.
Huh?! Thinks I. Friday night? And so I rang and discovered that N believed my birthday to be Wednesday, not Tuesday. I'll get to how she came by that assumption in a moment dear listener...and the cheesecake was for a (surprise) dinner at L & B's.
We race forward in time now to Wednesday evening and as I was a little under the weather, I'd retired to bed when lo! (again) the telephone doth ring!
(L & B together) Happy Birthday!!!
Awww thanks you two, but it was yesterday (says I from deep under my doona)
Oh no!! (says L) B!!!!! (and I think I heard a thud over the phone which could've been B suffering a serious whack to the side of the head but I can't be sure)
It was then we discovered the problem. B... who's known me some 20 odd years.. had proclaimed with absolute certainty to one and all, that my birthday was the 8th.
Just as I was mentally compiling a list of appropriately repentive and suitably hideous curses to inflict upon B for his error... L followed with an invitation to a (no longer a surprise) dinner on Friday night at thier home.
B was forgiven... for now!
So while it did kinda suck that those few others who claim to love me the most completely forgot my birthday AGAIN (shame on you all)... I care not... for this Friday I shall dine on roast beast and feast on homemade cheesecake with the baking genius N and the lovely L & B.
It's a tale of a birthday girl and her dear friends... who's accidental application of her birthday to the incorrect date nearly saw them suffer a grisly fate including, amongst other things... having a portrait of my blue monkey jammie clad self surgically affixed to the inside of their eyelids to plague them in their sleep!
My birthday was last Tuesday, the 7th in case any of you would like to note it down in your diaries for next year (and no, of course I have no moral objection to hideously expensive gifts... thanks for asking).
My day commenced at 5:30am with...
(Munchkins singing) Happy Birthday to you, you're 102, you look like a monkey and you smell like one toooooo! (repeat 17 times at ear splitting volumes to fully appreciate the effects it had at such a wee hour of the morning after yet another night of ridiculously pointless insomnia!)
... and concluded at midnight, as all days do and there'd been one.. count them... ONE, happy birthday phone call.. being from the oh so talented A-N, who shares the same birthday as myself so in essence, we sing happy birthday to each other.
So there I was.. by Wednesday morning, muttering things to do with my friends entrails next time I saw them when lo! the mobile phone doth beep!!
An SMS had arrived from N 'doing the happy birthday dance' for me and requesting what species of cheesecake I'd like for Friday night.
Huh?! Thinks I. Friday night? And so I rang and discovered that N believed my birthday to be Wednesday, not Tuesday. I'll get to how she came by that assumption in a moment dear listener...and the cheesecake was for a (surprise) dinner at L & B's.
We race forward in time now to Wednesday evening and as I was a little under the weather, I'd retired to bed when lo! (again) the telephone doth ring!
(L & B together) Happy Birthday!!!
Awww thanks you two, but it was yesterday (says I from deep under my doona)
Oh no!! (says L) B!!!!! (and I think I heard a thud over the phone which could've been B suffering a serious whack to the side of the head but I can't be sure)
It was then we discovered the problem. B... who's known me some 20 odd years.. had proclaimed with absolute certainty to one and all, that my birthday was the 8th.
Just as I was mentally compiling a list of appropriately repentive and suitably hideous curses to inflict upon B for his error... L followed with an invitation to a (no longer a surprise) dinner on Friday night at thier home.
B was forgiven... for now!
So while it did kinda suck that those few others who claim to love me the most completely forgot my birthday AGAIN (shame on you all)... I care not... for this Friday I shall dine on roast beast and feast on homemade cheesecake with the baking genius N and the lovely L & B.
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