Once upon a time.....
..... there lived a beautiful young girl (ok well maybe not beautiful and not so young come to think of it) who lived in a little cottage in the woods (hmmm well there is the odd tree in the yard anyway) with a pair of cute little Munchkins (no..her name was NOT Dorothy!). One day, as she was riding through the country(city)side on her valiant steed (go The Pea!), she wondered aloud to herself. 'Alas (dammit!!)'.. she wondered. 'I must find a way to divest myself of that most plaguey of plagues... that most poxyiest of poxes...the dreaded..the reviled...Ebayism!!!' Yes it was true. This fair maiden (pfffffft! yeah right) and succumbed once again, to the lures of that which was known as Ebay! Was there any hope for this lovely waif of the forest (waif? hmmmm) Sure, she now sported the 'buffest' index finger in the kingdom and naturally, there was the thrill of the chase (read: making ridiculously high bids to secure the item!). But mostly, it was an attempt to satisy the girlish excitement (again with the age reference??) that swept her away when ever those brave and daring couriers (surly posties) had something in their saddle bag (little postie motorbike that goes putt putt putt!) for her. As her noble mount (yay The Pea!) galloped toward home (crawled to a halt in the traffic) she keenly felt the consternation of her dilemma (where are these words when I'm playing Literati?????) until, casting her eyes about her in anguish she saw a plough horse (big old station wagon) with a man and two small babes seated on (in) it. Written across the horse's rump (or bumper sticker.. you pick) were the words...'Help! Dad's farted and we can't get out!!' She realised that perhaps things weren't that bad and that she could live with the Ebayist within herself after all and with a sigh (great gaffaw of laughter!!).. rode off into the sunset. The End (thank gawd!!)
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